By Marley Malenfant/se news editor
Students and faculty discussed proper parenting and communication with children at the Can We Talk seminar on SE Campus Nov. 19.
SE sociology professor Sharon Wettengel said parents should talk to their children in a correct manner. She gave step-by-step directions on how to talk to children from before their birth to their 18th birthday.
“It’s never too soon to start talking to your kid,” she said. “It’s very important you talk to kids at a day care level. Parents are at work all day and may only talk to their kid twice.”
Wettengel said parents and children think differently, so parents need to think about how their kids think.
“You have to understand children receive things differently from adults. They aren’t as experienced,” she said. “Kids are visual learners. Whatever the child sees, they are going to repeat it.”
Wettengel said parents should choose words wisely when talking to children.
“Kids are always going to ask questions, and you may feel annoyed. But don’t use harsh words and sarcasm,” she said. “Kids will feel rejected if you keep sending them away. Keep your voice low and let the child speak.”
Students from Wettengel’s philosophy class demonstrated scenarios of what teenagers and parents go through. Wettengel wanted to show what can happen when teenagers and their parents argue.
“Parents don’t always understand their kid,” she said. “Kids try to find themselves, and they go through identity crises. Parents need to get involved in the teenagers’ interest, find out what they like to do.”
Wettengel said having any type of relationship with a child takes a lot of work and can’t be rushed.
“Relationships can be lost, but it takes time to make things work with your kid,” she said. “You can have a good relationship with your kid, and some days are more difficult than others. You have to pick your battles.”
SE student Jesse Boyce said his relationship with his mother is stronger because his parents are not together.
“It’s just me and my mom. We’re close. We have to be,” he said. “My parents got a divorce when I was 3. He stays in Colorado, so there’s a lot of back-and-forth with my mom and dad.”
SE student Victoria Kadadi said her relationship with her parents is long-distance.
“We are very close,” she said. “I call them once a week, and we talk for about an hour. The last time I got to see them was eight months ago.”
SE student Gloria Garcia said she lives with her parents.
“It’s so good I still live with them,” she said. “We have our conflicts, but it’s OK. There are days when I’m like, ‘I need my own place,’ but we work things out.”