By Bethany Sanderson/reporter
NW speech instructor Bobbi Stringer discussed the five different aspects of love during her 5 Love Languages workshop in NW Campus’ Love Conference April 28.
Inspired by Dr. Gary Chapman’s book The 5 Love Languages, Stringer said each person has an individual love language that expresses and decodes love in different ways.
The first love language is physical touch, a basic need for human survival. Newborn babies have been shown to grow quickly when having their skin touched or massaged, she said.
The second love language is quality time, which includes quality conversation and quality activities. With quality conversation, two people should be focused on the other person with undivided attention using active listening.
Stringer said multi-tasking while trying to have a conversation gives a non-verbal queue to the other, saying they are not the only important thing the person is paying attention to.
“Listen with your ears and your eyes,” she said.
With quality activities, it is not about the “what,” but the “why.” Stringer said it is more important to be with the other person than the activity they take part in.
The third love language is receiving gifts, the visual symbols of love, according to Chapman.
“To some people, just hearing the words ‘I love you’ sounds empty,” Stringer said.
The fourth love language is acts of service. Stringer said this comes easy for men.
People should try to go outside of everyday life for the acts of service, which take thoughtful planning, she said. People should be internally motivated to give.
The fifth love language is words of affirmation, which can come in direct or indirect verbal compliments. Whether the person is present or absent, someone complimenting them is an example of this love language.
Knowing how to determine a love language can come by observing one’s own behavior, noticing what one requests of others, listening to complaints and taking the love language profile.
The profile can be found at www.5lovelanguages.com/takethetest.