Perfect ratio of standing your ground: Does it exist?

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OLLA MOKHTAR
campus editor
olla.mokhtar@my.tccd.edu

The amount of times people let things go just because there’s finally some peace is astonishing, but I don’t blame them. 

There’s an eerie feeling that creeps up from nowhere when you fail to stand up for yourself. It’s like you know you should and have to for your sake but everyone seems to like the climate now, so why change it?

It may seem smooth sailing to everyone else, but when you go back home or are alone it is anything but.

The fact of the matter is and as corny as it sounds, you have to love yourself enough to stand up for yourself. So you change the climate, no matter how calm or collected everyone else is, because you matter.

We are human and we crave being so utterly important to someone that they’d do this for us, but it isn’t the same. At the end of the day we will be alone more often than with a particular person, because, well, they have their own lives.

Waiting for someone else in a romantic situation is very different from waiting for someone in a situation where you have to defend yourself, or stand your ground. When you don’t wait, that is when self love enters the chat and all hell breaks loose.

How dare you say something that riles everyone up, are you that selfish? 

The answer should be yes, you are.

Selfishness is considered as something wrong but I beg to differ, it is the one thing that prevents you from being a doormat, a “yes person”.

Sure, if you’re in the middle of the desert and you’re the only one with food to feed two people don’t be selfish. But we aren’t discussing food, were discussing self worth and what it could possibly do if you aren’t selfish once in a while.

So whether its saying no to going out to the movies or defending yourself in an argument, selfishness’ absence is detrimental.

There’s no perfect recipe of selfishness to self love ratio when it comes to standing your ground, but one thing’s for certain, it needs to be done and it needs to be done by you.

The consequences of not standing your ground are unique to everyone because every situation is different, but they have the underlying theme of seeming like a doormat to others. 

And subconsciously, they will put down a mental note that tells them that you’re okay with it because you didn’t do anything that one time someone treated you badly.

Other people’s opinions don’t matter. Feeling good about your decisions, feeling good about yourself is something no one can take away from yourself, so own it.