By Rosa Martinez Rodriguez/reporter
People sometimes don’t realize they are in a bad relationship because they don’t know the signs of a jerk or jerkette or are unaware of solutions, a guest speaker told SE Campus students recently.
David Taylor, recruiter for the Healthy Families Coalition of Tarrant County, presented Healthy versus Unhealthy Relationships, a Feb. 5 seminar sponsored by the SE counseling department.
Not only women get involved in unhealthy relationships, Taylor said.
“Girls can be jerks too,” he said.
For a healthier relationship, Taylor recommends a 90-day probation period.
“Most relationships end in 90 days,” he said.
Throughout a probationary period, one can see the other person’s true colors, Taylor said.
Such time provides the opportunity to see how the other person behaves in various situations.
In addition, it develops open communication in the relationship, moving it to a deeper stage.
More than 100 students filled the entire North Ballroom on SE Campus to hear Taylor say rushing into a relationship too fast because of unhealthy emotional needs leads to an unhealthy relationship.
People raised with a lack of attention and affection tend to feel a sense of a void, which causes them to rush into a relationship, Taylor said.
But a way to prevent being in a damaging relationship is to keep five key points — knowing, trusting, relying, committing and touching — balanced, he said.
Taylor said the five bonding dynamics apply to any type of relationship.
“Keep your guard appropriately,” he said. “Don’t trust someone just because you like him/her.”
Taylor said a healthy relationship starts by earning each other’s trust and develops through time.
Jaime Michel, a SE Campus freshman, said he learned women are not the only ones in unhealthy relationships.
“The class was helpful,” he said.
Sophomore Beatriz Rico said she learned something new. She said she did not know “relationships ended in 90 days.”
Taylor said the divorce rate in Tarrant County is close to 60 percent.
According to an article on depression-guide.com, “A good relationship, where those involved accept one another as they are and are supportive when required, can help prevent depression. A bad relationship … can cause it.”
Programs like the Women’s Center, SafeHaven and the Parenting Center offer counseling for people in unhealthy relationships.
TCC campuses have full-time counselors available for students who need help.
