By Shirlett Warren/nw news editor
One for the Money is not a tribute to Elvis Presley and his blue suede shoes.
The action comedy starring Katherine Heigl is based on the first book of the Stephanie Plum series by best-selling author Janet Evanovich. The movie attempts to pick up the quick-witted pace of the popular Evanovich book, but the screen adaptation is more aloof than it is amusing.
Plum (Heigl), a former Macy’s lingerie salesperson, announces to her family during dinner that she was laid off six months earlier. She’s clearly had time to process this news as her cute, red convertible, which is parked in front of her parents’ house, is subsequently towed.
No problem. The next day, her grandma (Debbie Reynolds) gives her a job recommendation and the keys to her vintage car.
Plum shows up to visit her cousin Vinnie (yes, her cousin Vinnie), and, voila, he hires her as a bounty hunter — or as she prefers to call herself, a recovery specialist.
With a little luck and her background selling lingerie, she lands a high-profile recovery case worth $50,000. Her task is to track down a runaway cop named Joe Morelli (Jason O’Mara), a murder suspect. Morelli also happens to be an old high-school sweetheart who broke her heart after a one-night stand.
That same day, Plum miraculously establishes contact with Morelli and begins a cat-and-mouse game with him as she tries to get him to cooperate with her new job mission.
And, in the next three days, she manages to stumble on a crime lead, gain the trust of prostitutes on the street to become her informants, survive being attacked by a serial rapist, master her bootlegged pistol at the firing range by hitting her target directly in the heart repeatedly, avoid being murdered and save the lives of innocent people.
Besides the lingerie-salesperson-turned-bounty-hunter premise, this movie doesn’t work for a number of reasons.
First, Plum sometimes speaks in a first-person narrative. The narrative is part of the success of Evanovich’s book series. In the movie, however, the narration feels intrusive and misplaced. It appears the director tried to work around it, but then someone remembered there was supposed to be a narration so one is just squeezed in from time to time.
Next, the chemistry between Heigl and O’Mara isn’t hot. Back in 1992, Marisa Tomei played a tough Jersey girl whose boyfriend was a short, middle-aged man with a high-pitched voice named Vinny. There was a believable romantic chemistry between them.
Plum is supposedly a tough Jersey girl whose romantic interest is a young cop who looks like a cross between Mel Gibson and Jude Law. Yawn.
Also, the supporting cast steals the show. Sherri Shepherd confirms her comedic brilliance as Lula the prostitute, and Reynolds is hilarious as Grandma Mazur. Sadly, their performances are patches sewn on an unsalvageable pair of jeans ripping at the seams.
And, finally, the one-liners are flat. A poll on Evanovich’s site asks fans for their favorite quote from the movie.
“I shot that sucker right in the gumpy,” is one of the choices.
A line that is not on the site was delivered by Heigl during a dialogue between Plum and Morelli about their past relationship.
“[That’s] ancient history, like the pyramids, baby,” she said.
Umm…wow.