By Alice Hale/reporter
Students and faculty learned the importance of giving oneself unconditional love April 4 on NE Campus.
In Self-Image vs. Self-Esteem, Karen Fisler, sociology/psychology instructor, said self-esteem is a natural part of humans, but self-image is what is learned by positive and negative interactions with others.
As babies, people are not aware of such things as prejudice, worry or the need to be cool. Instead, they are capable of being completely genuine and feeling secure in themselves. Not until children begin to learn and grow within a society do people develop insecurities.
The most important step in finding unconditional love and building self-esteem is to cut out negative thoughts and words.
“If you find yourself having a negative thought, just simply tell yourself, ‘Stop it!’ and move on,” she said. “Also try and keep negative or aggressive words out of your life while also learning to say ‘no.’”
People enable others to depend on them and accept certain actions from them when they never say no or when they make up an excuse when they do say no, Fisler said.
“Just say ‘no,’” she said. “Do not make up an excuse, and, most importantly, do not feel guilty about it.”
Student Audrey Doyle took this message to heart and plans to apply it not only in her future profession in psychology but also in her personal life now.
“I realized today that I was not forgiving myself for things in my past, and that, in turn, has kept me from fully loving myself,” she said. “I’ve got to apply these ideas and help myself before I can help others in my profession.”
Fisler gave everyone in attendance toys such as hula hoops, yo-yos and marbles to demonstrate the need to fulfill a person’s inner child.
“It’s very important to let that inner child out from time to time,” she said after a 10-minute play break.
Students such as Onita Fangu found this part of the program inspirational.
“I had to grow up at a very young age in my household, and I never felt that I had a childhood or made time for play,” she said. “Growing up at an extremely young age, I sheltered myself. It felt great to just let myself go and in a way learn to simply play today.”
Fisler, who has taught at TCC since 2007 and works full time for Mental Health Mental Retardation of Tarrant County, said building self-esteem is no easy task.
“It is no change that will come overnight or as soon as you walk out of this room today. I wish it was that easy,” she said. “But by making small changes each day, those will explode into great things and give you a better self-esteem later on.”
