By Frances Matteck/editor-in-chief
Last week, a 24-year-old woman moved in with her 55-year-old fiancée. The age difference alone provokes a wince, but when the man is a suspect for crimes committed against his previous two wives and is still technically married to the most recent one, it becomes horrifying.
Christina Raines, 24, and her two children moved in with Drew Peterson, 55, about a week ago.
Women younger than 30 years old are more at risk to be victims of domestic violence than their elders.
Why do young women get involved with bad guys?
One of the biggest reasons is low self-esteem – they just don’t think they can do better.
This lack of self-esteem is a poor reflection of how these women were raised. Were their role models sick the day of Self-worth 101? Their parents and teachers should have taught them that they were special. No one should ever have to feel as though they are settling for someone because they can’t do any better.
Some women crave an emotional connection with another person.
This desire becomes unhealthy when they sacrifice their physical, emotional or mental well-being for their bond with the other person.
Just because a woman thinks she has a connection with someone who treats her like a doormat doesn’t mean it’s really there.
She has to love herself before she can love and be loved by another person. This requires her to respect herself and to expect others to do the same.
Some women have self-esteem and respect themselves, but still commit themselves to bad guys. These women naively believe they can change the person they’re with.
Both men and women need to get over this ridiculous notion.
If you want to change someone, you have no reason to be with him or her in the first place. You are more likely to get hurt in the attempt than succeed in changing the other person.
Raines fits best into this category. Peterson has admitted that she is not 100 percent confident in his innocence, yet she is still committing herself. She is risking herself and, worse, her children on a man who could very likely hurt or kill any of them. Shame on her.
Shame on the men who prey on women. Shame on the friends and family who see what’s going on and don’t help. To the women suffering in silence, seek help. It’s probably the hardest thing you’ll ever do, but it is also the bravest.
How will you raise your daughters?
