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The Collegian

The Student News Site of Tarrant County College

The Collegian

The Student News Site of Tarrant County College

The Collegian

Movie Review-Machete Kills

Actor+Danny+Trejo+returns+as+detective-turned-spy+Machete+Cortez+in+Machete+Kills.++Photo+courtesy+Open+Road+Films
Actor Danny Trejo returns as detective-turned-spy Machete Cortez in Machete Kills. Photo courtesy Open Road Films

By Rhiannon Saegert/managing editor

Actor Danny Trejo returns as detective-turned-spy Machete Cortez in Machete Kills.  Photo courtesy Open Road Films
Actor Danny Trejo returns as detective-turned-spy Machete Cortez in Machete Kills. Photo courtesy Open Road Films

Machete Kills, the sequel to Machete, is one of the most ridiculous films ever made, and we should all be grateful for that.

The “plot” is the sort of thing a bunch of eighth graders might write for fun: brainless, devoid of logic, but completely and utterly enthusiastic and joyful. It dares its audience to question its awesomeness with every single lunatic development. That said, it is pretty awesome in an escapist, anime-esque way that plenty of people can and will enjoy.

The point is this movie doesn’t resemble reality for a second. It is practically a cartoon. The original Machete was over the top, but the sequel takes audience expectations and runs with them right over the edge of logic. It’s not so much a story, more like one continuous action scene where CGI blood, scantily-clad women and explosions fill the screen at every opportunity. The breakneck pace would usually be overwhelming, but since the movie is all flash and no substance anyway, it works out just fine. By the way, those scantily-clad actresses actually look threatening when brandishing their guns and getting into fights. Action films, take note!

Compare this to something like the infamous Sharknado movie, which tried hard to be “so bad it’s good” but turned out to be just plain dull. Machete Kills has an even more ridiculous premise but was made by people who understood that the only way to make something like this work is by being committed to the crazy and never once flinching or apologizing. The result is pure undiluted entertainment.

At the beginning and end of the movie are trailers for a third film, which must be seen to be believed and might make some fans of the first two films say, “OK, now that’s just too far.” However, this series seems unlikely to jump the shark. It’s far more likely to wrestle the shark, put it in a headlock, strap it to a rocket and ride that shark into the sun.

Final take: Just enjoy the ride. My sanity is forfeited, Viva Machete!

Those who might like it: Action fans who don’t need their film to contain any logic or comprehensibility. 

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