Expensive gowns, tiaras and balls are foreign concepts to the average Joe. Your closest experience to a taste of opulence and pagaentry was probably prom. So when TikToker Lara Cosima made a “get ready with me” to attend a ball in Spain in an expensive gown and tiara perched atop her head, you can imagine the varied reactions.
Throughout the video, Cosima talked through her routine with the same energy of someone getting ready to go to the grocery store. To her, this was not a once-in-a-lifetime experience — just a mundane day in her life.
Some viewers commented on the post gushing about how they wish they would live her life. Some took the investigative approach and took a deep dive into how this lifestyle could be possible.
The answer: blood money. Cosima’s full name is Lara Cosima Henckel von Donnersmarck. She is a member of the House of Henckel von Donnersmarck, a noble Prussian family, who allegedly helped fund the invasion of Poland during World War II and supposedly had ties to the Nazi party.
Suddenly, the comments turned from how lucky she is to how could she. Cosima issued an apology and explanation, claiming that her family lost all their money and they had to rebuild themselves following the war.
People immediately came to her defense, saying that it wasn’t her fault that she was born into a life of privilege and that she couldn’t control what her ancestors did.
However, the issue isn’t that she happened to be born into an aristocratic family. The issue is the inevitable successes and privileges she has gained without acknowledging the exploitation and death that afforded her said opportunities.
Her TikTok account is now private.
But, this isn’t unique to nepo babies. You too can pull yourself up by the bootstraps while simultaneously loosening everyone else’s. Beyoncé did it.
In a 2021 campaign with Tiffany & Co., Beyoncé wore a 128.54 carat yellow diamond necklace. Upon further digging, it was revealed to be a blood diamond.
After the fact, Beyoncé claimed that she wasn’t aware of the diamond’s history. Her mother Tina Knowles came to her defense saying “How many of you socially conscious activists own diamonds? Did you check to see where the diamond came from? Probably not!”
The everyday person shopping at Kay Jewelers probably doesn’t know how many carats the diamond they just bought is, much less if it was ethically sourced. While it doesn’t excuse it, shopping sustainably isn’t always accessible or affordable. But this is Beyoncé. A few phone calls and most anything is accessible to her.
What is perhaps most troubling is hypocrisy of the situation. There’s even a hefty section on her Wikipedia page about her philanthropy. For 1,166 words dedicated to her history with philanthropy, she should’ve been cognizant in the first place to be aware of what she is collaborating with. But that’s the power of privilege.
The ability to not have to think about how your actions, intentional or not, can affect others. But, like gaslighting or virtue-signaling, it’s become a buzzword. People have probably already tuned you out by the time you’re one syllable in.
Admitting you’ve been given a headstart in life or you should’ve actually done your due diligence is important to encourage accountability and have conversations about how to empower the unprivileged.
Intersectionality exists. You can hold and not hold privilege simultaneously. Examining how they interact with one another is necessary for equity and a world where you don’t get ratioed in your comment section.
