By Meredith Bonham/reporter

   “Taking care of yourself” is the secret to successfully balancing the multiple roles of women today, a speaker shared with South Campus students Feb. 8.
   Flo Stanton, coordinator of the South Campus health center, led a workshop for Women in New Roles to coach women to be more effective individuals by learning to balance their multiple roles.
   “ I need to be in the right relationship with me in order to be in the right relationship with others,” she said.
In this interactive workshop, Stanton had each of the 29 students brainstorm their different life roles.
   “ Student, mom, wage earner, wife, friend, daughter, sister, granddaughter, aunt, caregiver, coworker, volunteer, Christian, counselor, employee or employer and life partner” made up the list of roles filled by the women in the room.
   But the most important role, the speaker said, was listed last or was overlooked until Stanton pointed it out: self.
   Then Stanton asked the group to list their top five roles and percent of time given to each.
   The majority of women concluded that 70 percent of their time is devoted to their work, giving them little time to fulfill the needs in their other roles.
   Stanton suggested that women establish time limits for each role to eliminate conflict.
   These limits may mean cutting back on work hours or spending more time in the library studying for a test.
   Letting go is the second step in dealing with role conflict.
   Stanton said women should let go of guilt, let go of excess minute responsibilities and let go of negative people.
   “ Mothers are to be role models, not martyrs,” she said.
   “ Communication is an important factor to balancing roles,” she said.
   Stanton suggested getting a personal planner and writing down a specific time for one’s self in the midst of the other responsibilities that person might have.
   Stanton also suggested buying a family calendar so that each member of the family can write down what he or she needs within the 24 hours of when he or she needs it.
   Using Post-it notes for reminders or having a check off list at home will allow the whole family to help with the chores that need to be done.
   When parents want their children to clean their room, they should tell them exactly what to do and check to see if it’s being done.
   When they need to study for class, women should not hesitate to ask their husbands to do the dishes or cook dinner.
   Stanton said women should be flexible.
   “ Compromise your compulsive perfectionism and let someone help you out around the house,” she said.   “Don’t worry about how the dishes are arranged in the dishwasher. Just let someone do it for you.”
   Stanton encouraged the group to set up “pamper-me-time.” She suggested taking a bubble bath and setting some time aside in the day not to worry about the mile-long list of tasks to do before bedtime.
   Stanton also reminded students to turn off their cell phones.
   “ It’s not easy, but you can do it” she said.